So this morning I head to work, as usual, but this time I don't find parking! I've been parking in a dorms parking lot across the street. (Employees are NOT allowed to park in our private lot, we will get a boot. How stupid is that?) So usually it's not a problem... I usually get my spot next to the tree and million ant piles (I don't know how I haven't gotten bit all summer) but the lot was full this morning!! I guess the freshman all got their cars yesterday and a bunch more moved into Lakeside.... Now, I don't want you to think that I have a problem with the UF parking system. OH wait!!! Yes, I DO have a problem with the system. Not enough spots for everyone. Anyways, different rant different post... SO I end up following this girl to her car. Yep, I was the creeper rolling slowly toward her, willing her to RUN to her car.
Got her spot! Then I walk to my building and found a little sheet of paper stuck in the door. Crap! I start thinking maybe someone caught me for leaving early last night, oh and every night I'm supposed to work until 8. Or that they knew that was 4 minutes late this morning (due to stalking) But negative on both!!
JOKES!!!
There were jokes!!!
They Sharing Everything
A young man saw an elderly couple sitting down to lunch at McDonald's. He noticed that they had ordered one meal, and an extra drink cup. As he watched, the gentleman carefully divided the hamburger in half, then counted the fies until each had half. He poured half of the soft drink into the extra cup, placed it in front of his wife and began to eat. His wife sat watching, with her hands folded in her lap.
The young man asked if they would allow him to purchase another meal so that they wouldn't have to split theirs.
The old gentleman said, "Oh no. We've been married 50 years, and everything has always been and always will be shared, 50/50."
The young man then asked the wife if she was going to eat, and she replied, "In a while. It's his turn with the teeth."
EWWWWWWWWWWWWW
Hahahaha Defintely brightened my morning. The cleaning lady is here. She's finished her breakfast. Oh, she decided she was only going to empty the main office's trash can on fridays. Awesome. Good thing I sit here ALL week.
I'm going to be like this woman and start bringing a delicious breakfast... but I suppose she has food in her refriderator and pantry... lucky
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Monday, July 27, 2009
Monday... Funday?
A woman called in today to reserve her daughters wedding here 2 years from now. I had to fill out something dated 2011. Talk about space age. She asked me what the rules were and I had to wonder if they will change by then... Will your robot walk you down the aisle? (don't worry dad, whenever I get married, that's your job. No robot could replace you). Will you hand out blackberries as wedding presents? Obviously it was a slow morning... I came up with a lot of ideas...
Then on my afternoon shift (Bless you Amanda for coming in) I brought my trusty pink pillow and a book on tape I got this afternoon. It's true. I took a nap at my desk. This isn't the first time it's happened. It's also not the first time bear was here (my blanket). But, it was the first time I used my pillow... It. was. AWESOME. Totally recommend it to the slackers out there. Just listened to my book and drooled away.
Going to make shrimp tacos (DELICIOUS) and drink wine and watch the bachelorette season finale tonight. Cannot believe it's over. Thank god, Jillian you annoy me. I really hope Kiptyn wins, Ed needs a girl that appreciates his shorty shorts.
Then on my afternoon shift (Bless you Amanda for coming in) I brought my trusty pink pillow and a book on tape I got this afternoon. It's true. I took a nap at my desk. This isn't the first time it's happened. It's also not the first time bear was here (my blanket). But, it was the first time I used my pillow... It. was. AWESOME. Totally recommend it to the slackers out there. Just listened to my book and drooled away.
Going to make shrimp tacos (DELICIOUS) and drink wine and watch the bachelorette season finale tonight. Cannot believe it's over. Thank god, Jillian you annoy me. I really hope Kiptyn wins, Ed needs a girl that appreciates his shorty shorts.
Sunday, July 26, 2009
thank you, preacher-man!
Had a pretty uneventful weekend. ha! get it? uneventful and I organize events...
ok, bad joke.
I had a long chat with a preacher who does a lot of weddings today. Apparently, he feels my pain when people don't leave time for pictures but expect us to stay open. I have brides call all the time saying "I reserved the chapel from 3-5 so when do we have to stop taking pictures?" um... at 5 you 'tard. He always asks thee couples when they have set aside time for this photo business and for that I am grateful.
You may be asking yourself "self, why is Kelsey blogging at 8:30 pm on a Sunday" well, I have the answer! Some couple is renewing their vows. There is no better time to reconfess your love than 8pm on a Sunday.. So I get to work until 9:30 tonight and be back at 8am tomorrow. Lucky me!!
Also, today I overheard (yes, I eavesdrop) that the reception was going to be at the place I will be interning at in the fall. Just neat to hear that both of the places employing me work together..
Alright Mom and Dad, I'll talk to you later
ok, bad joke.
I had a long chat with a preacher who does a lot of weddings today. Apparently, he feels my pain when people don't leave time for pictures but expect us to stay open. I have brides call all the time saying "I reserved the chapel from 3-5 so when do we have to stop taking pictures?" um... at 5 you 'tard. He always asks thee couples when they have set aside time for this photo business and for that I am grateful.
You may be asking yourself "self, why is Kelsey blogging at 8:30 pm on a Sunday" well, I have the answer! Some couple is renewing their vows. There is no better time to reconfess your love than 8pm on a Sunday.. So I get to work until 9:30 tonight and be back at 8am tomorrow. Lucky me!!
Also, today I overheard (yes, I eavesdrop) that the reception was going to be at the place I will be interning at in the fall. Just neat to hear that both of the places employing me work together..
Alright Mom and Dad, I'll talk to you later
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Bowling??
How does bowling and working at a wedding site relate? I checked our voicemail today (something I hate to do because I'm bad at writing down the number someone is speed saying) and there was a message from a gentleman. Said gentleman begins a long story of how he's been bowling since he was 11 and got really good when he was 17-18, with a bowling average around 270. (Yes, impressive but why'd you call and leave a VOICEMAIL about it??) He goes on to say how he is now 29 (and living with his parents- ok i made that up) and is interested in our bowling program. I thought for a second if maybe the other employees had started a secret leaque without me but that is silly, who wouldn't want me on their secret team? So I wrote down the message on our message-pad thingy and my boss checked it off!! She actually read it, I wonder if she called him back... Poor guy, just trying to get out of the house...
Never a dull moment around here... Ok lots of dull moments but always an entertaining story!
Never a dull moment around here... Ok lots of dull moments but always an entertaining story!
Monday, July 20, 2009
Just like Garfield
I hate Mondays. I have to be at work by 8am. Now, if you know me you would have thought that task would be next to impossible. It would have come after pigs flying and pineapples playing music. But, I do it. At least twice a week.
This morning was relatively quiet... Tried to have a conversation with the cleaning lady, got the mail from the man in suspenders, tried to unlock one of the doors in the chapel which plan refuses to open.
This afternoon was a different story... About 5 minutes after I got here, I was still filling in my time sheet, THE FIRE ALARM WENT OFF. OK, what do I do now? I went into our kitchenette, where everything is broken anyways. No smoke. Went over to the chapel, no smoke. (Oh, and fire alarms echo and are the worse noise you have ever heard inside of a chapel) Now.. if you're a chi omega or know about the hot pocket incident you would understand my confusion. Standing outside not knowing at all what is going on.
I should mention that as I stepped outside the first time I saw 2 adults and a little girl walking from the chapel. They were telling the little girl to run, and I naively thought they were trying to save her from the noise.
A cop car comes and parks in our lot so I go out to talk to him about it but, he's not in his car. Damn. So I walk back over to the chapel and find him looking in all of our cabinet-thingys. He tells me the alarm was pulled (probably that little twit) and we go back to the office to disengage the alarm (sweet relief). He gets a call on his radio telling him that the alarm had been reset. He answered and then turned to me and was like no kidding, I was the one who reset it. What a system.
So that was pretty exciting.... Had 2 people ask where the bathroom was, not bad for a monday.
I did have one family ask me how I pronounced our name and when I told them the old hag told me I was wrong and taught me the "right" way to say it. I wanted to tell her to piss off, Ill say it however I want.
This morning was relatively quiet... Tried to have a conversation with the cleaning lady, got the mail from the man in suspenders, tried to unlock one of the doors in the chapel which plan refuses to open.
This afternoon was a different story... About 5 minutes after I got here, I was still filling in my time sheet, THE FIRE ALARM WENT OFF. OK, what do I do now? I went into our kitchenette, where everything is broken anyways. No smoke. Went over to the chapel, no smoke. (Oh, and fire alarms echo and are the worse noise you have ever heard inside of a chapel) Now.. if you're a chi omega or know about the hot pocket incident you would understand my confusion. Standing outside not knowing at all what is going on.
I should mention that as I stepped outside the first time I saw 2 adults and a little girl walking from the chapel. They were telling the little girl to run, and I naively thought they were trying to save her from the noise.
A cop car comes and parks in our lot so I go out to talk to him about it but, he's not in his car. Damn. So I walk back over to the chapel and find him looking in all of our cabinet-thingys. He tells me the alarm was pulled (probably that little twit) and we go back to the office to disengage the alarm (sweet relief). He gets a call on his radio telling him that the alarm had been reset. He answered and then turned to me and was like no kidding, I was the one who reset it. What a system.
So that was pretty exciting.... Had 2 people ask where the bathroom was, not bad for a monday.
I did have one family ask me how I pronounced our name and when I told them the old hag told me I was wrong and taught me the "right" way to say it. I wanted to tell her to piss off, Ill say it however I want.
Saturday, July 18, 2009
sing me a song you're the pianoman...
Obviously my job is really exciting because you avid readers are getting a second post! I thought I should give you an accurate count of bathroom requests... thats just good knowledge. I have had 6 people ask me where the bathroom was since my last post. 6. that is 6 more than should have happened.
Also, we have a guy here that plays the piano for the weddings (hence the title) and everytime he comes in he says he's never seen me before (not true) and asks what my name is. I tell him Kelsey and he replies, what an unusual name. Now is that Kelsey or Chelsea? I want to say "Kelsey, you turd, I didn't stutter" but i politely tell him Kelsey again. Then he ALWAYS asks how I spell it. Now my question is... why? are you going to look me up on facebook? name your child after me? why on earth do you need to know? But, I tell him. His response? Oh! Only one l? (why the heck would i have 2 of those?) and oh! I usually see it spelled with 2 e's at the end. Kellsee. I don't even think thats a name!!!
Oh yeah, did I mention he hums? Any time he's in the office (he uses the restroom before AND after each wedding, must drink a lot of water... but at least he doesn't ask where it is) he SINGS! la laa laaaa la laa. Excuse me sir, we're trying to cut down on the annoying habits.
So I did a dumb thing today... I borrowed Emily's headband with a flower on it. It's a great headband but everyone has told me, I like that flower in your hair, it's great for weddings! Yeah about that... I'm not going to your wedding....
Also, we have a guy here that plays the piano for the weddings (hence the title) and everytime he comes in he says he's never seen me before (not true) and asks what my name is. I tell him Kelsey and he replies, what an unusual name. Now is that Kelsey or Chelsea? I want to say "Kelsey, you turd, I didn't stutter" but i politely tell him Kelsey again. Then he ALWAYS asks how I spell it. Now my question is... why? are you going to look me up on facebook? name your child after me? why on earth do you need to know? But, I tell him. His response? Oh! Only one l? (why the heck would i have 2 of those?) and oh! I usually see it spelled with 2 e's at the end. Kellsee. I don't even think thats a name!!!
Oh yeah, did I mention he hums? Any time he's in the office (he uses the restroom before AND after each wedding, must drink a lot of water... but at least he doesn't ask where it is) he SINGS! la laa laaaa la laa. Excuse me sir, we're trying to cut down on the annoying habits.
So I did a dumb thing today... I borrowed Emily's headband with a flower on it. It's a great headband but everyone has told me, I like that flower in your hair, it's great for weddings! Yeah about that... I'm not going to your wedding....
I do as I'm told....
Hey dad! You might be the only one who is going to read this blog... But, as you requested it I shall write it. For anyone else who may be reading this (HA!) I will tell you WHY he has requested this little journal...
This summer I started a job at a little chapel which shall remain nameless. I applied for the job because I am an event management major at UF so I wanted to help plan events. Turns out I am a facility supervisor (your guess is as good as mine) and just unlock the buildings and turn on the AC for events... Not quite my dream job but the boozing (ahem, eating) money is nice.
Now this little chapel (max 95 guests type of little) has some of the strangest and how shall I say kinda dumb without being insulting... not the brightest patrons and visitors. So far I have had a bride in a forest green dress that matched her hubby-to-be's vest, we printed off the speech for the best man and they were discussing dungeons and dragons. Oh yeah and all the groomsmen changed into jeans and ratty t-shirts for the REHEARSAL DINNER. I have had a countless amount of people ask me where the bathroom is and many just yell at me through my window.
Let me paint you a picture of my office so you can see the frustration this gives me.... Our building has one door, my office is to the right of it with a big window, which I sit in front of. When you walk into the building there is one door to my office and literally 6 inches from it is the restroom. You cannot walk into the building without seeing the stickfigure and rollerderby man and woman picture. At least 3, max 10 people ask me every day where the bathroom is by poking their heads in my door. Mind you, they could do this from standing INSIDE the bathroom. Now on ocassion, at LEAST 4 times a week people don't bother opening the door and just yell through my window. These windows are not made of steel and I could probably hear them at a normal level (they can probably tell which episode of the Bachelorette I am on...) And I have to point at the door to tell them to open it. Novel concept I know. Some reallllly special guests will actually just knock on the door at this point. I am not going to get up from my cozy chair to let them in so if they can't figure it out they can use a tree outside.
This summer has been the summer of stupid questions and problems.
Yesterday an elderly man came into the office, me being the super employee tried to help him out or was going to kindly show him the 2+ steps to the bathroom. Instead, he proceeds to tell me about how he needs to get his drivers license renewed and the line at the DMV was too long and too far away (did he go?) and then he pulls out his notice from his pocket and reads me the paperwork he needs to bring in in order to renew correctly. He needs a birth certificate, to which he responds "I mean I haven't seen that since I went into the Navy", a marriage certificate, his response, looking at empty ring finger, proof of social security "oh i have that in jacksonville, no wait, its in my pocket hahaha". Now what is funny about that? Then he goes on to explain that President Bush messed this all up for him because of the illegal aliens, then tells me how he is in fact not an illegal alien. At this point he is treading on thin ice with me.... 1. I am not a DMV 2. I was eating lunch and 3. I liked President Bush. Sorry sir but I will not be laughing at your joke.
Just this morning as I am setting up for a memorial an older gentleman, a younger woman and I were walking towards the chapel. When I turned to go into the office to continue my job he asks me where the entrance to the chapel was. Which you can see from the sidewalk we were on. Oh yeah and there were 4 or 5 people standing out in front of the entrance and said younger woman was still heading in that direction. Follow the yellow brick road, sir. So I point him in the right direction and continue with putting out my signs. As I am carrying a sign to the chapel I overhear him ask another man where the entrance to the chapel was... Hm... I could throw a rock at the chapel from where he was standing, and I cannot throw far.
I'm sure these won't be the strangest things that happen on this property today. And if they aren't I shall repost... Let's face it, I don't have anything else to do... I'm caught up on the Bachelorette (Go Kiptyn!!!!)
Love you Mom and Dad and Dixie (my only blogger fans)
This summer I started a job at a little chapel which shall remain nameless. I applied for the job because I am an event management major at UF so I wanted to help plan events. Turns out I am a facility supervisor (your guess is as good as mine) and just unlock the buildings and turn on the AC for events... Not quite my dream job but the boozing (ahem, eating) money is nice.
Now this little chapel (max 95 guests type of little) has some of the strangest and how shall I say kinda dumb without being insulting... not the brightest patrons and visitors. So far I have had a bride in a forest green dress that matched her hubby-to-be's vest, we printed off the speech for the best man and they were discussing dungeons and dragons. Oh yeah and all the groomsmen changed into jeans and ratty t-shirts for the REHEARSAL DINNER. I have had a countless amount of people ask me where the bathroom is and many just yell at me through my window.
Let me paint you a picture of my office so you can see the frustration this gives me.... Our building has one door, my office is to the right of it with a big window, which I sit in front of. When you walk into the building there is one door to my office and literally 6 inches from it is the restroom. You cannot walk into the building without seeing the stickfigure and rollerderby man and woman picture. At least 3, max 10 people ask me every day where the bathroom is by poking their heads in my door. Mind you, they could do this from standing INSIDE the bathroom. Now on ocassion, at LEAST 4 times a week people don't bother opening the door and just yell through my window. These windows are not made of steel and I could probably hear them at a normal level (they can probably tell which episode of the Bachelorette I am on...) And I have to point at the door to tell them to open it. Novel concept I know. Some reallllly special guests will actually just knock on the door at this point. I am not going to get up from my cozy chair to let them in so if they can't figure it out they can use a tree outside.
This summer has been the summer of stupid questions and problems.
Yesterday an elderly man came into the office, me being the super employee tried to help him out or was going to kindly show him the 2+ steps to the bathroom. Instead, he proceeds to tell me about how he needs to get his drivers license renewed and the line at the DMV was too long and too far away (did he go?) and then he pulls out his notice from his pocket and reads me the paperwork he needs to bring in in order to renew correctly. He needs a birth certificate, to which he responds "I mean I haven't seen that since I went into the Navy", a marriage certificate, his response, looking at empty ring finger, proof of social security "oh i have that in jacksonville, no wait, its in my pocket hahaha". Now what is funny about that? Then he goes on to explain that President Bush messed this all up for him because of the illegal aliens, then tells me how he is in fact not an illegal alien. At this point he is treading on thin ice with me.... 1. I am not a DMV 2. I was eating lunch and 3. I liked President Bush. Sorry sir but I will not be laughing at your joke.
Just this morning as I am setting up for a memorial an older gentleman, a younger woman and I were walking towards the chapel. When I turned to go into the office to continue my job he asks me where the entrance to the chapel was. Which you can see from the sidewalk we were on. Oh yeah and there were 4 or 5 people standing out in front of the entrance and said younger woman was still heading in that direction. Follow the yellow brick road, sir. So I point him in the right direction and continue with putting out my signs. As I am carrying a sign to the chapel I overhear him ask another man where the entrance to the chapel was... Hm... I could throw a rock at the chapel from where he was standing, and I cannot throw far.
I'm sure these won't be the strangest things that happen on this property today. And if they aren't I shall repost... Let's face it, I don't have anything else to do... I'm caught up on the Bachelorette (Go Kiptyn!!!!)
Love you Mom and Dad and Dixie (my only blogger fans)
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